Lola I started dating this amazing girl about two weeks ago. She is everything a guy could ask for except for one thing. We had sex for the first time last week and it was great but every time I have gone down on her since, she farts. At first I ignored it but now I’m starting to get grossed out. Is there a way you can bring that up without hurting someone’s feelings? -Tony   Tony    No.  There isn’t.    Alright, if your girlfriend is so amazing why is she farting in your face? My question is: “Does she say excuse me?” I could say so many things right now but I won’t. I know this is awkward at best, so you are right to be cautious.   First off, you have to say something. That is the kind of thing that makes you want to never eat pussy again. You simply sit her down and say…   OK. There is no easy way to say it. You’re kind of fucked. Basically you will offend this girl no matter what. But apparently she didn’t mind if she farted in your face…repeatedly. So…you have to just pony up and tell her to try to control her asshole while you’re munching the carpet.   It gives me the willies just thinking about it. I wish I had better advice for you but if I were in your shoes, I would have soaked the bitch in gas and set her on fire.  Purge that disgusting memory with fire.     That or talk to her about it like an adult.   I like fire better.

Filed under: Ask Lolo Falanna, cocksandwich, Cunnilingus, eating pussy, farting, pussy