Maybe not, but he looks like one. Call me an asshole but would you leave him alone in a room with your kids? (I wouldn’t leave him alone with my cat!)

I am confused with all the people who can’t wait to see the pope come to NYC. We live in the most Godless times. Seriously, we thrive off of gossip and misery. No one wants to help anyone if it’s out of the way. Bigotry and hatred are alive and well in the good ol’ U-S of A. Yet thousands of “Christians” are gearing up to see what I believe to be a figure head and nothing more.

What has the pope done of late? A twelve page edict condemning homosexuality and an update of the ten commandments. That’s it. Oh! I almost forgot: and insult Islam. I am sorry but when an institution such as the Catholic church can turn a blind eye to decades of pedophilia within their own ranks, then they just lost the right to comment on homosexuality…or anything else for that matter. Hypocrisy runs rampant in the Vatican so I don’t really feel they are a legitimate source of virtue in this day and age.

I find it interesting that a lot of modern day Christians have forgotten about Jesus’ role in this whole religion thing. If you believe in Jesus then you’ve got to look at what he stood for. Jesus was the living example. Treat everyone with love, dignity and compassion. Period. These days you see all these televangelists damning everyone to hell if they don’t fit in to someone’s interpretation of what is good. Whatever happened to “Judge not, lest ye be judged”? Jesus said that “He who is without sin, cast the first stone.” And these days, more people than not are casting some pretty heavy rocks.

I think that it’s easy to say you believe in something if you don’t really have to practice it. Imagine a world where you actually would help the homeless and the poor because that’s how you were raised. We live in a world where we are desensitized to hunger, violence and poverty. Blame anything you want but I think it’s a culmination of things, starting in our own homes.

Remember a few years ago the grandmother in the mid-west who sued the company that made the video game Grand Theft Auto? She got it for her grandson and one day noticed that there was a video image of a bare breasted woman on the screen. She freaked the fuck out and sued, saying something like “I didn’t buy THIS!” The funny thing about this story is that Grand Theft Auto, though fun, is about killing cops for points. If you need to get somewhere, you have to car-jack someone. And you get extra points by beating up prostitutes. This lady wanted her grandson to have the good times that are accompanied by shooting and killing police officers but Jesus save our souls if we see a set of tits. Really, how mixed up is that? We are allowing our children to become used to violence in every way. But Jesus said tits and blow jobs are wrong?

Bullshit! What’s wrong is that people hide behind their religions because it allows them to not have to make choices. If religion was so important to everyone, there would be no war in Iraq. There would be tolerance of others. There would be no such thing as starvation or poverty. It’s just too easy to look away when you have convenient labels to stamp on the backs of other people. “That woman is homeless? She should get a job!” “Someone beat up a gay kid? He must have asked for it.” “Thousands are starving in our own country? What can I do?”

We can do alot. But first you have to want to do something. If religion hasn’t galvanized everyone together against these things, then what will? With the amount of Christians in this country, there should be endless bake sales and car washes to give back to the communities that everyone ignores. But that takes time and effort and the Bible doesn’t say anything about banana bread and garden hoses.

So when I think of the pope coming to touch our children…I mean preach the word of the Lord to the masses, I can’t help but feel like he is a Jim Henson creation. Just a giant puppet who has no significant power or intention to do any real good. Words are cheap and that is what a sermon from the pope is to me. Yet so many people are going to stand out in the streets and wait all day to get a glimpse of the pedophi…I mean pope. And for what?

I don’t know the answer to that one but I tell you what. When the endless, televised coverage of the pope’s visit is in full swing, I’ll be watching TMZ, looking for Britney Spears eating a dead chihuahua next to a dumpster in a back ally.

It’s as crazy as watching someone who condones pedophilia, talk about “good clean living.”

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